Smile...I'm singing again!

I went to the Christmas party for my favourite toddler group yesterday and I was somewhat disappointed to find that any form of Jesus had been written out of the scene.  We were learning "all about Christmas" and yet there was no mention of a wise man or a star...even what I would call angels were described as Christmas fairies!  All nursery rhymes had been re-written for us to sing including santa, reindeer, snowmen and presents.  Don't get me wrong I love a good present but surely (and I apologise for this in advance) JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON!

So I have taken it upon myself to re-write some of the classics with a nativity theme so you can sing them to your little ones (or yourself!) and learn all about the real, the very first, the one and only Christmas:

Smile...they're singing again dear!

Twinkle, twinkle little star,
how I wonder what you are,
up above the world so high,
to tell of Jesus birth nearby,
twinkle, twinkle little star,
how I wonder what you are!



To the tune of here we go round the mulberry bush:

Here we go down to Bethlehem, Bethlehem, Bethlehem
here we go down to Bethlehem, on a cold and dusty morning

the wise-men went to...

the shepherds went to...

Jesus was born in...

To the tune of three little men in a flying saucer:

3 wise-men riding on their camels,
went through the desert one day,
one looked left to right but he didn't like the sight
so he followed the star away,

2 wise-men...

1 wise man...

To the tune of Old McDonald:

Baby Jesus born in a Barn E,i,e,i,o,
and in that barn there was a....

donkey, cow, sheep etc

To the tune of Head, shoulders, knees and toes:
Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh, cense and Myrrh!
Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh, cense and Myrrh!
Gifts to give the new born king!
Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh, cense and Myrrh!

Please let me know if you can think of any more, five isn't many but my creativity has peaked today at that and banana muffins :)

I want a breadstick...

On returning home from nursery...

"Mummy I want porridge"

"Really? but isn't porridge a breakfast food?"

"I WANT PORRIDGE!"

"She's been talking about it all the way home" adds Daddy

"Wouldn't you rather have a bread stick" says Mummy, thinking this a more reasonable post-nursery snack.

"No, I want porridge"

"Ok you can have porridge"

*makes porridge*

"it's ready, come and sit at the table"

"NOOOO! I want to look at it first"

*toddler looks at and contemplates porridge*

"Mummy."

"Yes"

"I want a bread stick"

For. Crying. Out. Loud!

Jesus said "I am the bread of life" John 6:48 :)

Mad Mum, Bad Mum, Feeling a little bit Sad Mum

Dear Mad Mum...

you haven't left the house without one of your children for nearly four months...you can't see your bedroom carpet or remember its colour for the dirty washing and misplaced toys...hair bands are your best friend as they hide the grease really well...don't look too closely at the kitchen it makes your skin crawl...bite your tongue to stop yourself from cursing when you stand on the toy train/toy cutlery/ safety plug which the toddler can now remove from the socket...feed your screaming baby without being sicked on as said baby has a chest infect...smile sweetly and say "maybe later" as you hear the request "more Peppa Pig" for the 26th time in the past hour...
...and for the love of all things remember you're going out this Saturday for the first time in nearly four months without either of your children, to a murder mystery party no less which will hopefully satisfy the need to kill something.... in a safe and imaginary context...

Dear Bad Mum...

you have once again told the baby to shut up...although quietly so the toddler didn't hear so that's an improvement... you have given in and put baby to sleep on her stomach, despite all the recommendations and despite trying to feel ok with it you still feel like a terrible Mum...you fed the toddler hash browns and fish fingers smothered in ketchup because you just can't be bothered to battle her yet again to eat pasta or rice or potatoes or anything that doesn't really go with ketchup...you gave in and bought the ludicrously expensive packet of chocolate buttons at the chemist today to keep the peace and fed them to the toddler at 10 in the morning....you want to teach her all about Jesus but yet again can't be bothered to find the time to read the bible for yourself today...

Dear Sad Mum...

self pity is not your colour, despite being a sinner you still have more self awareness than your toddler and baby, some attitudes are just not acceptable- buck up your ideas.  Don't begrudge the fact that Jesus died for you because you just can't be bothered to say sorry and you'd rather wallow in self pity in vain hopes that if you just feel guilty enough God might accept you and then you wouldn't have to put upon Jesus once again and admit that you're useless and in need of a Saviour....
...It's ok to go out for the evening it might make you begrudge your children less....
...  Fish fingers aren't all that bad...

yours sincerely, Holly